Angry Kraken Beard Oils Review

Gentleman, it’s time to UNLEASH THE KRAKEN! The kraken I am referring to today is the Angry Kraken Beard Oils company, which can be found on Etsy.

The first thing I noticed immediately was the size of these beard oil bottles. These suckers aren’t your standard one ounce bottles, these bad boys are two big ounce bottles. Angry Kraken’s claim to fame is they only use certified, cold-pressed, organic ingredients, so there is no need to worry about any weird chemicals in their products, they’re all natural baby.

The base of their beard oil is 100% jojoba oil, which if your going to use only one carrier oil, jojoba is about the highest quality oil for your skin out there and that’s cool with me.

So let’s talk about the scents. The three scents I tested out were Captains Choice, Dry Dock and Calypso.

Captains Choice scent comes from vanilla and tangerine essential oils. Initially when I took that first smell of the oil in the bottle, just like Beard Times With Scott mentioned, I too smelled a cola scent.

Though out of the bottle the scent did not smell like cola any longer, but now smelled more like a dreamsicle. It’s a really nice scent and the oil absorbed really well. The scent lasted about 4 to 5 hours.

The next scent I tested was Dry Dock, a mix of cedarwood, blue spruce, and black spruce. In the bottle I smelled mostly cedar, but in the beard I got a lot more pine. I really liked the pine scent and I think I prefer it to the cedar scents I typically encounter.

I’m usually not to into the outdoor/woodsy scents, but Dry Dock just might be the one that changes all that. I feel like this is the the perfect switch up to the cologne type of scents I traditionally wear. For this reason, Dry Dock is currently rated as my #1 rated outdoors beard oil.

The final scent was Calypso, a smooth blend of cinnamon, patchouli, and sage. This scent really does evolve and morph throughout the day. In the bottle, initially I smelled root beer. In the beard, it was a smell that reminded me of Christmas and then later on reminded me of incense. The whole time it smelled good. It was interested how evolved as the day went on.

I thought all three scent were very good and a nice change of pace to the cologne scents I typically wear. Again, I was surprised how much I enjoyed Dry Dock because outdoors scents usually aren’t my thing, but I totally dig it!

Angry Kraken also offers beard balms with the same exact scents as their oils. I thought the balms had a good amount of scent to them. I know sometimes balms can have weaker scents, but the Angry Kraken balms had a good amount of scent to them. They too were excellent and had a medium hold to them.

If you’re looking for beard butter, they got that too. Their beard butter seriously smells good enough to eat. I really liked their beard butter, it did a really good job, and it’s some good stuff!

Another product that I got from Angry Kraken that I was surprised how much I liked was their Pine Tar soap bar. Obviously it has the scent of pine, but it was a really nice soap for washing your beard with. I actually liked using it all over.

Finally, an item I think any bearded guy would love is a personalised, laser engraved beard comb. Be honest, you know you want one!

Long story short, Angry Kraken has a lot going for it and I like them! If you want to try them out you can use the code THEESIMPLEMAN to get yourself some free shipping.

Leave a Reply